Living Martyr
by Rebel S2
Summary: Shadow may be the ultimate lifeform, but it is Sonic who pays the ultimate price for his sake, leaving him and his friends to carry on. But a plot deeper than any of them ever realized has been brewing, and it is up to Shadow to take the plunge into it's torrents if he wants to take back their lost, blue friend...if he would let him. (Friendship, angst, no pairings, now multi-chap)
1. Prologue: The Beginning

**_Edit 07/01/14: This WAS my first Sonic fanfic, and it received a lot of positive feedback since I posted it months ago. Initially a oneshot with potential, but due to popular demand and promises I refuse to break, this story is being made a MULTI-FIC. Haha. _**

**_Chapter summary: There were a lot of things that Shadow didn't understand about Sonic, why he did what he did. But when Sonic pays the ultimate price for another's sake, all the questions he leaves behind consumes Shadow from within. Only his friends can answer them, and Shadow must come to a life-changing revelation for him to accept the peaceful life Sonic left for him._**

**_Warnings: Slight OOC on Shadow's part and possibly the other characters, depending on how you view them, a little character study for Sonic, which may differ from others. Lastly, this prologue has a very, VERY different writing style from the rest of the fic, which I hopefully will be able to finish._**

**_Disclaimer: Sonic the Hedgehog and all other characters all belong to SEGA…I think…or whoever the heck owns them. First story, people, how the heck could I own the friggin' franchise?!_**

_**Enjoy. Hope it doesn't suck too bad.**_

* * *

**PROLOGUE: THE BEGINNING**

"You always have to have the last word, don't you, Faker?"

Shadow glared at the hedgehog sitting lazily in front of him with crossed legs, wide, alert eyes and a smiling face. They were on a cliff a few kilometers from Station Square and Green Hill, where Sonic and his friends lived. The scene before him was the sparkling sea, dark and mysterious under the early evening sky. The first few stars glimmered above, and in a few minutes he knew a full moon would appear as well.

But the only thing that mattered was the figure in front of him – a statue of Sonic the Hedgehog, carved in a special kind of stone that would not easily weaken or be destroyed. The way the statue smiled and had eyes that follow him infuriated Shadow to no end, much like the real Sonic.

Shadow kept staring at the statue, willing his anger to manifest in his eyes. Never in his life had he been as angry as he was. It was at par if not beyond the fury he felt upon learning of Maria's death. In fact, he was itching to remove his inhibitor rings just to unleash his rage, but restrained himself.

"You probably think you've finally won, don't you? That this is just another race between you and your archrival." Shadow seethed. "I'm even more competition for you than Eggman, aren't I? So why shouldn't you be laughing at me right now?"

Ever since they had met, Shadow and Sonic had always been at odds with each other. They were so similar in appearance and abilities, and yet so opposite in personality. Sonic was a cocky and carefree daredevil while Shadow was a cold and serious loner. They clashed every time they met and the number of times they were on opposite sides of the battlefield were too many for Shadow to remember.

Again, Shadow found the urge to vent his frustrations out on a listener who could not talk back. Either because he did not want someone to really understand what he was saying or because he did not want to listen to someone failing to, he was not sure. All he knew was that he had to let it out before it consumed him from within.

"I'm your archrival, Faker. So why did you come for me in the first place?" he spat.

Come and rescue Shadow, that is, from a fate worse than death, and even dragged along all his friends with him. That was just a week ago. Shadow could still remember how he was strapped to a table, already too exhausted from the searing pain all over his body, a side effect of the antigen GUN had used him as a guinea pig for.

Sonic had demanded the commander – not the one who accepted Shadow as an agent, he had '_mysteriously died in his sleep'_ – release Shadow and end his project of creating a new weapon out of the hedgehog. The commander, his predecessor's hasty replacement, had refused and launched an attack on them.

The thought of the speed demon sent a pang of pain through Shadow's chest but for what reason, he was not sure. Ever since the change in command of GUN and his demotion from agent to lab rat, there was a lot of things he wasn't sure of any more.

Like why Sonic suddenly had the urge to become a noble idiot. And for Shadow, of all people!

"I never asked for your help, Faker." He continued in an accusing voice. "It was none of your business. Why couldn't you just leave me to it? It was my burden and mine alone."

Back in the lab, Sonic had managed to run to Shadow, release him from his bindings and passed him on to Knuckles and Rouge, ordering them to retreat and get to safety. He also told Tails and Amy to join them, as they would probably be attacked by even more agents on the way out. Sonic said that he would remain in the lab to stall the commander and most of the GUN army.

Then, Shadow had wanted to fight too, but he could barely even stand on his own. Knuckles and Rouge had to put one of his arms around each of their shoulders to support him. Sonic, with a cocky smile on his face, had reassured them that he would be fine.

Returning to the present, Shadow pounded the ground in anger and frustration, not enjoying having to remember everything in detail. Why did Sonic have to be so arrogant?

"Did you think that you could handle it, blue hedgehog? You aren't invincible, there was no way you could. For all that you've survived, you're still _just_ a hedgehog!" Shadow hissed at the statue in front of him. "_You_ aren't the _ultimate lifeform_. **_I am!_**"

A chaos spear materialized into Shadow's palm and he threw it in rage, but subconsciously aimed to miss the statue. It flew down beyond the cliff and out of sight. He felt pang of guilt and he almost took a step back from the blow. It had hit him so hard that he could already feel his chest constricting from the pain, as if it had manifested physically.

In his mind, he saw the moment that changed everything. Just as Knuckles and Rouge dragged him out the laboratory's door, the commander had smashed a small but deadly bomb, causing it to set off. Shadow had willed enough energy to yell Sonic's name, telling him to escape even though he knew that the bomb's radius would reach him and his friends, even if they could run.

To his horror, Sonic didn't rush out of the lab. Instead, he had run to the computer on the opposite side of the laboratory and pressed a glowing red button. In that split second, Shadow had caught Sonic's gaze before the metallic door slammed down, effectively muffling the explosion that happened a second later.

Sonic, along with the commander and a dozen GUN agents were trapped inside. Shadow knew there was no way he could have survived an explosion that close in a confined room. It was complete suicide.

What made the pain in his chest worse was that he knew that _Sonic knew_ _the same_ but didn't stop. It was no accident or panicked mistake on the hedgehog's part. He saw it when their eyes connected. He was fully aware of what he was doing and did it anyway. Sonic had died willingly for him. He had made the ultimate sacrifice so Shadow could be where he was that day.

"Why did you do it, Faker?!" Shadow had stood up as he yelled, staring down at the still smiling statue with angry eyes that held a faint glimmer of hurt in them. "I never asked for you to save me! I'm your opposite, your greatest rival. So why the hell would you just throw your life away for mine, Sonic? Tell me!"

Shadow felt some kind of moisture behind his eyes but blinked them away. There were so many unanswered questions and the only person he could ask was dead, so Shadow was reduced to speaking to a stone replica of the original being. He had become desperate, and if this continued, he'd probably go insane too.

He didn't know why, but he felt sorrow, confusion and hurt stirring within him. An unfamiliar pain in his chest squeezed at his heart and Shadow dropped to the ground with clenched fists, trying to regain some sense of dignity, the numerous questions of 'why?' still revolving in his head.

"Because you weren't _just_ Sonic's rival." A voice said from behind. "You still aren't."

Suddenly aware that he was not alone, Shadow looked over his shoulder to see the red echidna standing behind him a few feet away with his arms crossed and the same hard expression he always wore on his face, but with exhaustion and grief mixed into it. The past week had not been especially kind to him either.

"How did you find me?" Shadow asked, but his voice lost its cutting edge and coldness. Instead, it was void and empty of emotion, as if Shadow had nothing to live for anymore.

Knuckles must've been in a good mood, for he dropped his giant hands to his side and his face broke into a soft smile. "We've been looking everywhere for you since you left the hospital last week. I should've known you'd be at his memorial."

Shadow turned away to stare at the sitting statue that was Sonic's memorial. The only reason they could not call it a grave was because they never recovered the body, having had to flee quickly. It didn't matter, anyway. They all knew that Sonic was dead and gone.

Shadow made no point to talk, hoping that the echidna would get the hint and leave him alone. He was almost disappointed when Knuckles finally spoke up.

"Tails, Amy, Rouge and I decided to have a picnic dinner then camp out for the night. We're hoping you'd join us."

"I wish to be left alone, echidna." Shadow replied in a flat voice, again hoping that he'd get the message.

"Aw, come on." Knuckles said in a tone that eerily resembled Sonic's whenever he would ask to race. "You're voice lacks its usual conviction. Don't you ever get tired of being alone?"

"You're one to talk, spending your entire life up on that island." Shadow responded a bit too bitterly than he would have liked. But he did have a point.

"Yes, and now I'm spending time down here." Knuckles replied easily. "It's what Sonic would've wanted. Don't you think so too, Shadow?"

His words triggered memories in Shadow's mind of the mentioned blue hedgehog pestering him with invitations to adventures, lunches, hang outs and the like. All those times he had turned Sonic down and the younger hedgehog would complain to no end. Now a part of him regretted not going to at least one. Now it was too late.

For some reason, Shadow stood up, dusted himself off and gestured to Knuckles to lead the way. He was not sure what made him want to go, but the thought of Sonic made him do so. Together they walked side by side in silence. Shadow was not interested in engaging in a conversation, one because he was too deep in thought and two because it was his fault Sonic had died and he didn't know why Knuckles was not angry at him for it.

Just as when the picnic area came into view, Shadow remembered what Knuckles had first said.

"What did you mean?" he decided to ask, turning his head to look at him.

"Huh?" Knuckles replied in confusion.

"You said that I wasn't just Faker's rival. What did you mean?" Shadow repeated.

Knuckles remained silent for a while then returned Shadow's gaze with sad eyes. "You seem to think that all Sonic saw in you was competition. I used to think that that was what I was to him too, when we first met. But, like he did for me, Sonic always thought of you as a friend."

"A friend?" Shadow said, raising his head in confusion. "We have been rivals since we met until the day he…he left…" he paused to swallow hard "…and we have fought on opposite sides countless times. What leads you to believe he considers me a friend?"

"He died for you, didn't he?" Knuckles said in a tone not accusing, but still managed to stop Shadow from walking. "He wouldn't do that for just anybody."

They were only a few meters from the others by then, and Knuckles had gone ahead to make their presence known. Amy, Tails and even Rouge greeted him warmly and, upon catching sight of Shadow, waved at him and gestured for him to join them.

The four friends were surrounded by different kinds of food, from fruits, to cake, to sandwiches, and even chilidogs. A single lamp rested in the middle, casting a strong enough glow for them to see, but not outshining the light from the moon and stars. In spite of the warmth and coziness they offered, Shadow could not find it in himself to sit down with them. He stayed outside their circle, head bowed and eyes downcast.

"Come on, Shadow!" Amy said cheerfully, clearing away a space on the checkered cloth for Shadow to sit. "Feel free to eat whatever you like."

"Yeah, Shadow." Tails said through a mouthful. "It's really good."

"Even the ultimate lifeform should eat something once in a while, you know." Rouge said lightly.

"How?" Shadow whispered loud enough for them to hear, earning him four questioning glances. "How can you be so accepting of the cause of his death? He was your friend, was he not?"

It was true. Anyone could see that Sonic had a place in their heart. In fact, he was the glue that held them all together. He was Tails' brother, Amy's idol, Knuckles' best friend and Rouge's ally. He was a part of their lives, a part that was now lost forever, and they could just accept the reason Sonic died amongst them? Wouldn't that be dishonoring his memory?

Shadow managed to look up and was surprised to see their faces. Instead of anger or confusion or even pity, they held some kind of sad understanding and kindness, as if they knew some kind of truth he didn't but was going to find out.

"You see, Shadow…" Tails began in a gentle and sad voice. "We never really talked about it, but there was always an unspoken understanding among us about Sonic. Deep down, we always knew he would get himself killed for one of us."

Shadow took a step back. "You knew?"

"It's pretty obvious, actually." Rouge answered. "The quickest way to get to Sonic was through someone he cares about. He would rush into battle without a plan, or get himself into something he can't get out of if it meant saving us."

"Like when Sonic learned that GUN was after you." Amy added. "Sonic had wanted to locate and burst into their base and find out why, or run around the world to make sure you were alright. After learning that GUN had finally caught you, he had rushed out in search of the base you were in. It's his greatest weakness, even more so than water."

"His greatest weakness?" Shadow repeated, still not completely understanding it all.

"Sonic cares for his friends so much that, when they're in danger, he forgets everything else." Knuckles explained. "He'll do anything to save them, even disregarding his own wellbeing. We all know he can be impatient, and that leads to his rash actions which usually causes his downfall. It's a trait of his that can easily be exploited."

"Why did you not stop him, then?" Shadow questioned, though he was careful not to sound accusing, only curious. "If you knew that it made him vulnerable, why did you not try to warn him before?"

A moment of silence passed, and the four seated figures exchanged knowing glances.

"Because," Tails answered, his eyes faraway, staring at the past "it's also his greatest strength. I still don't know how he does it, but I've seen him do the impossible if one of our lives were at stake. His speed is his power, but I know that what fuels it is his drive and motivation to save the those that matter to him a lot."

"But why?" Shadow still asked, not fully understanding. "Why would he care so much as to just throw his own life away for someone else's?"

"Because that's who he is." Amy said softly, and Shadow could see that her eyes were shining. "He puts their lives above his own. He never showed it, but Sonic's world revolves around those he cares about and his will for them to be safe and happy."

"Sonic would die if it meant saving his friends." Tails said sadly, his own cheeks now wet. But he looked up at Shadow with shining eyes. "He would have died for us, just as he died for you, Shadow, because that's what we are to him."

For the first time since Sonic's death, the tears that he didn't know existed poured down Shadow's face. He fell to his knees with a thud and covered his face with his hands while shaking with silent sobs. Finally, he understood.

For all his cockiness and attitude, Sonic had a heart that beat for his friends. He lived for them because they are what mattered most. Sonic _loved _them so much that he would be willing to die for them in a heartbeat. And he, Shadow the Hedgehog, the Ultimate Lifeform, the cold and aloof loner, was Sonic's friend. Sonic cared for him just as much as he did the others.

But Shadow was crying for a whole different but equally important revelation: Just as much as he was Sonic's friend, Sonic was his friend, too. The blue hedgehog had always been there for him, even though he never saw it. He cared for Sonic like a comrade, like a brother. And, just like Tails, Amy, Knuckles and Rouge, a part of him had died too when the explosion claimed Sonic's life.

He was never used to it, but for once Shadow allowed himself to freely show the emotions he had always bottled up. His shoulders shook with silent sobs and his hands kept wiping at the tears that did not stop falling. A part of him felt that he looked undignified and pathetic, but appearances didn't matter to him. Not anymore.

Shadow felt a hand on his shoulder and looked to see Rouge smiling at him, her own eyes wet. Looking around, he saw that Amy, Knuckles and Tails were crying silent tears too, no doubt at the memory of their friend and hero.

"It's alright to cry, Shadow." Rouge said. "We miss him too, and we'll never forget him. But, knowing Sonic, he would want us to live our lives to the fullest, and we can't let his sacrifice go in vain."

Here were people who understood and shared his pain, so he finally gave in and sat on the picnic cloth to join them in their simple meal under the stars. He did not talk as much as the rest, but he was content to simply be in their company. They talked of all the times they had with Sonic, from funny, to scary, to simply stupid, as if he had never really left. Together, they laughed and cried at his memory. It was what Sonic would have wanted.

"To Sonic." Tails said, raising a glass of orange juice in the air for a toast. "You made the ultimate sacrifice by dying for us, bro, and we'll never forget it. We're going to live our lives for your sake. That's a promise!"

Everyone raised their glasses in agreement, even Shadow. Comforted by Tails' words, he smiled for the first time since he could remember. If there was one thing he and Sonic shared, it was that they never went back on their word. He would keep his promise and make the most out of everything, starting then by making friends with those he could truly trust. For Sonic.

"_Take care of yourselves, everyone. Catch you on the flip side!_"

Shadow whipped his head to the side and gazed at the dark horizon. Only a forest of tall and dark pine trees in the distance stared back at him, through which the wind blew through. He was sure that the voice was Sonic's, but there was no way that it could be him, could it?

"Shadow?" Knuckles called out, confused. "You okay?"

Shadow stared in anticipation of something before turning back with a smirk, relaxing. "I'm fine. Just thought I heard something."

It would be just like Sonic to play tricks on him, even as a ghost, he thought. Shadow looked up to see the star-scattered sky and marveled at their glowing light. However, he chose to ignore the scene above and closed his eyes. He pictured a blue hedgehog with a confident smirk and an outstretched hand calling him 'Shadz' even though he knew he hated nicknames.

_'__Wherever you are, Sonic,'_ Shadow told him _'I hope you're happy. Watch out for us, will you?'_

Even if it was just in his head, Shadow had a feeling that Sonic heard him.

* * *

Sonic crouched hidden among the branches of a tall pine tree, glad that it was dark enough for him to camouflage his blue fur. From his vantage point, he could see Knuckles approach Shadow, who was in front of his stone memorial.

"That's a relief." Sonic murmured to himself, looking at the statue of himself. "I was worried they wouldn't get it right."

Sonic watched Knuckles and Shadow leave and changed vantage points to watch them at the picnic. He was too far away to hear their voices, but his keen eyesight saw how all of them were crying, even Shadow who had collapsed into sobs. Sonic was tempted to go to them, to tell them that he was alive, but he knew he couldn't. Not without putting them in danger.

But after Shadow finally joined them, he saw that they seemed better and happier, either crying or laughing or doing both at the same time. They even gave a toast! There was still a sense of grief and sadness among them, but he knew that they would be alright. They had to be.

"Take care of yourselves, everyone." he said as tears started to fall at the thought of having to leave them, perhaps forever. "Catch you on the flip side!"

With that, Sonic took off, but not without seeing Shadow turn his head and almost see him. But the blue hedgehog had only increased speed under the grueling training he was in, and he easily entered the sound barrier without making the booming noise.

Sonic sped through mountain ranges and valleys until finally he had reached his destination: a secluded cave in the middle of nowhere. However, he did not stop, instead running through the covered entrance. Inside, Sonic ran through the labyrinth of tunnels until he had reached a metal door. Entering, he was greeted by a click of a stopwatch.

"Thirty seconds." The GUN commander said, checking the stopwatch. "That's longer than the time you were supposed to achieve after a week of continuous testing."

"Guess your antigen isn't as good as you think." Sonic replied with as much attitude he could put into his tone. "Told you this whole project was a waste."

The commander's eyes flashed dangerously. "Don't push your luck, hedgehog. We had a deal, remember?" His face broke out into a sadistic grin "In exchange for your friends' safety and ignorance – "

" – I would stay in Shadow's place as your guinea pig without resisting or trying to escape." Sonic recited in a bored tone. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're like an old woman who wouldn't stop nagging, you know that?"

"Just making sure you remember your end of the deal." The commander said lightly, gesturing for Sonic to come closer as he inserted a fluid in the injector. Sonic neared, but did not hold out his arm like he was supposed to.

"And let me remind you of _your_ end." Sonic said darkly, his green eyes menacing despite having lost their usual sparkle from taking regular dosages of the antigen. "If I so much as hear GUN having anything to do with any of my friends, _any one of them_, I **will** bust myself out and I **will** let the entire nation know of all the dirty secrets this organization has been hiding behind the cover of protecting its people. _Do I make myself clear?_"

The commander glared at Sonic, who matched it with his own before answering. "Crystal clear, hedgehog."

Sonic held out his arm which the commander grabbed roughly and stabbed the needle into the crook of his elbow. Sonic instantly felt the searing pain that accompanied the fluid flowing through his bloodstream and winced.

The commander, satisfied, turned away and looked at his watch, counting down the seconds since injecting Sonic.

"I must warn you, however," He said without taking his eyes off the clock. "that the project was designed for someone with Black Doom's DNA, such as Shadow. Without it, the antigen reacts differently with your body, making the pain ten times worse and longer upon application. And Shadow was out cold after only a single dosage."

Sonic, who could already feel the antigen circulating, gritted his teeth and clenched his fist, trying his best not to show weakness. "I can handle it."

"Can you?" The commander asked and was satisfied to watch Sonic collapse onto the metallic floor, clutching his head in agony. He stopped counting after thirty seconds, when Sonic could no longer hold in the pain and began screaming in pure anguish.

After what seemed like an eternity, Sonic's screams turned to gasps, his voice having been used up but the pain still continuously increasing. A great part of his concentration was into keeping himself conscious and sane over the torture the antigen gave him. Like what he always did whenever he was in danger of giving up, Sonic reminded himself of the reason why he had to stay alive and clung onto that like his life depended on it.

There was no way he would allow himself to die. He was the only thing stopping GUN from attacking his friends. He would force himself to stand through daily – no, hourly – torture and torment of any kind, be it physical, mental, psychological or emotional. He would live through hell and endure everything they'd do to him if it meant his friends' safety and happiness. To him, it didn't matter if he could or couldn't do it, because he had to, and so he would.

Sonic knew deep down, despite his slowly losing consciousness, that the ultimate sacrifice he could make for his friends was not a noble but quick death. The ultimate sacrifice took much more than that. It was to live a life of pain and anguish in the worse possible way and stay alive until you knew that your friends were safe.

That was the sacrifice Sonic was making, and right before he blacked out, he knew he didn't regret it.

* * *

**_EDIT 07/01/2014: Note this is the prologue. A lot of stuff are going to happen, which will be explained in later chapters. Heh. _**

**_Just a note: I would never have gotten to courage to try to make this into a multi-chap without the reviews from SuperSonicBoom 12, orion, EliTigre, tailsthefox92, AngelCakes2335, Guest(whoever you are), and ShinyShiny9. Thank you for that, I think I needed it._**


	2. Dreams and Ghosts

**_Posting this goes against my writing principle of finishing writing EVERYTHING before I start posting (note that the first chapter was meant to be a oneshot). However, it's been months since that prologue has been written and posted, and I figured it'd be better to post this next chapter now instead of having to make people wait longer. Though that means the chapter after this will be a while and at irregular times. Sorry._**

**_Chapter Summary: It has been six months since Sonic's death, and Shadow has been struggling to live up to his promise, what with Eggman and GUN popping up every now and then. But as he settles into a semi-normal life with those he has come to call his friends, his world gets turned upside down when the past begins to catch up to him._**

**_Chapter Warnings: Maybe a bit OOC still for Shadow and the others but especially for one major character. But that will be explained through the story. Ugh, violence, I guess?_**

**_Disclaimer: No. Don't own it, them, whatever. You've heard enough out of me._**

* * *

**PART 1 : DREAMS AND GHOSTS**

**Six months later...**

_"Shadow!" _

_The black hedgehog whipped his head to the side, anxiously trying to listen to find out from where Sonic's voice was coming from in the maze of dark tunnels. The metallic walls of GUN's base eerily resembled those of Eggman's, minus the robots that acted as guards. Strangely enough, no agents were patrolling either, leaving the ultimate lifeform to figure out on his own where he was and how to get to Sonic before his time ran out. The mental clock in his head kept ticking, and he was starting to panic._

_"Shadow!" the voice yelled again, this time more desperate. _

_"Sonic, where are you?!" Shadow yelled back, his own voice rising in pitch as he skated forward, trying to listen out and find his lost friend. Being alone gave him no danger, but it also meant that he had no way of locating the blue hedgehog in the never-ending labyrinth of halls and passages that they were locked up in._

_"Shadow!" was the shouted reply, louder and filled with fear. "Help me!" he cried._

_A tunnel to the left appeared before him as the rest of the hall disappeared, and he was forced to follow. After several twists and turns as random passages rose and fell before him, as if the walls themselves were toying with him, he rounded a sharp corner and skid to a halt at what he saw._

_At the end of the far hall, Sonic was being restrained by two GUN agents who held him against a wall by the arms and legs as the GUN commander loomed over him, a large needle in hand, ready to inject it into the his bloodstream. Sonic stared at the pointed tip fearfully, then locked eyes with Shadow, silently calling for help._

_"Shadz…" His mouth never moved to speak, but he had heard the quiet whisper pleading for him to save him. _

_"Sonic!" Shadow yelled, skating forward as fast as his feet could carry him. "I'm coming!"_

_He skated faster and faster, increasing speed and using all his energy in accelerating, and yet he didn't get any nearer than where he stood, almost as if the hall expanded with his running. He tried to reach the distance between him and his friend, but watched helplessly, too far away, when the commander turned around, a small, familiar bomb in hand and a sadistic smirk on his face. _

_"No…" Shadow thought desperately, forcing himself to get closer._

_He watched as the bomb was smashed to the ground and, in the same instant, a metallic door that appeared out of nowhere dropped down, closing the gap between the ceiling and the floor._

_"Shadow!" Sonic yelled one final time, locking eyes with Shadow in a last plea for help before the barrier finally cut them off at the bottom, separating them permanently._

_Shadow leaped forward, suddenly close enough to reach him but not fast enough to make it in time to get through. He landed on his stomach in front of the metal a second too late, and a muffled explosion came from the other side a moment later. _

_"No…" He murmured, pushing himself up and staring at the metal wall. "Sonic! Answer me!"_

_No other sound came from within, and he banged at the metal with both fists multiple times, tears starting to make their way down his muzzle. "No, this isn't how it was supposed to happen! No no no no…"_

_Defeated, he could only stare at his reflection in the metal, watch as his own tear-stained face hardened into an angry and murderous look that glared back at him._

_"This was your fault." His reflection suddenly said, until the metal disappeared into black nothingness and he was standing in front of a hedgehog that looked exactly like him, glaring hatefully at him. "You weren't strong enough, you weren't fast enough…"_

_Shadow took a step back as his copy marched forward, looking down on him as he seemed to grow bigger. _

_"I-I tried…" he answered back forcefully, shocked and scared at the menacing figure that was his own reflection. "I tried to save him! But I couldn't and I'm sorry…I'm so sorry…"_

_He stumbled back as his copy loomed over him, glaring down at him. But then the red stripes disappeared and the black fur melded into blue and it was no longer himself that stood over him, but Sonic._

_"Did you really?" His once cocky and confident voice asked in a sad tone, as if he didn't believe what Shadow had just said. The glare had disappeared into a sad, hurt look, as if he had put his trust in Shadow and was betrayed by him. "You could've done it if you wanted to, you could've saved me but you didn't…"_

_He looked away, ears flat against his skull, refusing to meet Shadow's gaze._

_"No!" Shadow, shocked by the sincerity in his voice as if he actually believed his own words, stood up in one swift motion and grabbed the other hedgehog's shoulders, shaking him. "I would never have wanted you to die, Sonic! I promise you, I tried but failed…I failed…"_

_Sonic met his gaze in silence and Shadow almost thought that he was considering his words when he didn't react. However, his eyes turned angry and he pulled away, violently removing Shadow's hands on his shoulders with a rough tug._

_"No, you _didn't_ try!" he yelled, pointing an accusing finger at him. The look of hurt became one of fury, his green eyes blazing in anger. "You never cared, not when I was alive. And the only reason you _think_ you care now is because you think you owe me, _don't you_!"_

_His hands turned into fists as he advanced on Shadow, who was frozen in shock by his words. He watched in horrified fascination as Sonic drew his fist behind him, ready to deal a blow to his face._

_"DON'T YOU?!"_

* * *

"NO!" Shadow bolted upright in bed, covered in sweat and breathing hard. Slowly, unsure, he took in the painted wall in front of him, and the tangled sheets around him and the light from the window beating down on him. He was in his home at Green Hill, not far from where the rest of his and Sonic's friends were, and not trapped in some metallic base that was where he would die, or even worse, where Sonic did.

"A bad dream…" He whispered to himself. "…just another bad dream…"

Knowing that going back to sleep would be useless especially since he didn't need it being the ultimate lifeform, he got up from the bed and walked across the hall in his home into the bathroom, wanting to wash his face. A look into the mirror revealed to him his tear-streaked muzzle and weary face, making clear the signs of nightmares. He'd been having a lot of those since then…

Cleaning himself up to remove any signs of distress, he made his way down the hall into the kitchen, wanting to make himself some form of breakfast to distract himself from his latest nightmare. In his kitchen were a fully furnished stove, refrigerator and microwave, which Amy Rose had taught him how to use. In the center of his kitchen was a table that served as an island in case he had visitors for a meal, something that was, apparently, common practice for the people he had come to call his friends.

Grabbing some leftovers, he quickly stuck it into his microwave, not wanting to be bothered to cook. His mind still could not shake off the awful feelings that had started his day, something that seemed to be determined to distract him. Taking his food out, he crossed the hall to his fully furnished living room, with two leather chairs, a matching couch and a heavy wooden table in the center.

Plopping down onto his sofa, he turned on the television without paying attention, only wishing to fill the silence of his home as he ate. Personally, he greatly appreciated and enjoyed his time alone, especially since befriending the rest of the people in Green Hill had been quickly eating at his 'alone time'. He didn't mind, honestly, for he had found it being a bit worthwhile to make friends, but he still needed time for himself on a regular basis.

Unfortunately, it was during his alone times that he like to brood and entertain his thoughts, which quickly turned dark without anyone to prevent them, himself included. This time, it was what his strange dream meant, about what his reflection, and, even worse, what Sonic said about him. That he didn't try hard enough. That he had failed.

It was true that, in the aftermath of Sonic's death, Shadow had promised himself that he would make friends with those he felt he could trust. So far, the mechanic fox, Tails, the Master Emerald's guardian, Knuckles, and even the female hedgehog that used to keep mistaking him for Sonic, Amy Rose, had become his closest friends aside from Rouge. To a lesser extent, he had made friends with the little rabbit Cream and her mother, met the trio that were the Chaotix, and even competed against the three birds on the extreme gear in another World Grand Prix.

But, he could not deny that Sonic's death still weighed heavy in his chest, and he still felt guilty about the circumstances of it. It was still enough to give him recurring nightmares for the past six months and – like his latest one – reminded him that he was unable to do anything to save him. The guilt and regret he felt for that, and for how he had treated him before then still ate at him, something he could only admit to himself.

His thoughts, however, were interrupted by a 'Breaking News Flash' on the television, which he stared at passively, in case there was something he should pay attention to.

"_At around nine thirty this morning, Station Square, one of the most populous cities in the country, was attacked by evil mad scientist Dr. Eggman_, _threatening to destroy the city if his demands were not met. Reporters live from the – "_

With a click of a button, Shadow shut the television off with a sigh, knowing that he would have to deal with the doctor again for the umpteenth time. Quickly finishing his meal and dumping the dishes to be washed at a later time, he made his way down the hall leading to his front door, glancing at the calendar on the wall.

He stopped for a second to regard the day's date, which was marked because Tails and Rouge had wanted to meet up for the evening for something regarding the chaos emeralds. All they had given him was the day of the week, which he quickly identified.

However, it was not the reminder of their plan that evening that caused him to sigh wearily before rushing out the door to Station Square, nor was it the reason why he promised himself to clear his mental schedule for the day in favour of visiting a secluded area in the outskirts of Green Hill, where Sonic's memorial was.

It was the date itself: the twenty-third of June.

* * *

Shadow watched impassively as the large, now headless, humanoid robot toppled over onto its back and crash into the empty streets away from him. Crowds of people who were being evacuated by GUN's foot soldiers and agents cheered at his success, and even some of the agents themselves joined in. In the distance, the main head and the base of control of the robot was hovering away with the Doctor, having been forced to flee when Shadow arrived and promptly trashed the machine.

Looking around quickly, Shadow hid the yellow Chaos Emerald he had managed to extract from the robot before glancing up at his surroundings yet again. Satisfied that no one had seen him slip the emerald away, he turned around, ready to leave…

…until he came face to face with one of the agents of GUN itself. The man wore the usual bulletproof armour and had all the loaded weapons that were standardized for field operations and emergency procedures, and yet what he was doing – approaching Shadow calmly instead of helping in restraining the people – were against orders.

However, as the man neared, Shadow could see the slightest difference on his uniform. Right below where the organization's emblem was embroidered on the shoulders was as a single word: _Captain_.

From that word alone, he knew: the agent wasn't the one following orders; he was giving them. At least, in the field. Shadow regarded him carefully, keeping his guard up, not trusting him one bit. Even after six months, he wouldn't just let go of what his organization did to him, what they had tried to make out of him.

Although _Project: Antigen_ had been a behind-closed-doors operation, he had expected the organization to publically label him a criminal running away from justice and hunt him down to continue the long-term experimentation on him. He found it unlikely that they would leave him alone, especially the new commander who seemed to harbour a deep hatred for him and was intent on pushing through with the project.

However, after the ordeal with Sonic, they backed off, not bothering him at all. His 'wanted' status seemed to have disappeared, and the official statement on him when asked by the media was that he had resigned on his own terms. After which, he nor anyone else he knew never heard from them again.

But that didn't mean he would forget everything that happened, wouldn't forget that it was their bomb that caused Sonic's death. That was the one piece of information that never got out, that led the world to believe that Sonic the Hedgehog had mysteriously vanished off the face of the earth, never to be seen again. It would be useless to let the world know the truth, for they had no body, no evidence, no records, nothing.

Even if they did, the commander would have simply denied the ordeal or, even worse, would have labelled his death as 'collateral damage' and 'for the good of the world'.

That, he refused to accept.

"Shadow the Hedgehog," the agent said, loud enough for nearby people to hear as he removed his helmet to reveal a rather young, male face, probably in his mid-twenties. "On behalf of G.U.N., I would like to offer my sincerest thanks and gratitude for putting Dr. Eggman in his place and protecting the city of Station Square."

"Don't mention it." Shadow replied hastily, not wanting to be in close proximity with him. His title and bold move to speak for the organization suggested that he was the highest ranking officer present, as only sergeants and cadets usually made it into the field, commonly lead by a lieutenant. A captain was one step above that.

"Sir, this city and the organization is in debt to you for your efforts in stopping Eggman." The man continued, seemingly ignoring Shadow's curt and dismissing tone that yelled '_piss off_' in silence. Then his voice lowered so that only the hedgehog could hear him. "Especially after Sonic the Hedgehog's disappearance six months ago…"

That was enough to snap Shadow, and instead of trying to distance himself, he stood his ground and glared coldly. "Don't you _dare_ speak of _him_."

His icy tone caused the man to stop in his tracks and whatever response he had seemed to die in his throat upon meeting the murderous blood-red eyes of Shadow the Hedgehog.

Surprised at the explicit show of fear on the man's face, he looked away, internally confused. Never did GUN have an agent so easily frightened by a glare to rise to one of the higher ranks in their military, no matter the skill. Such an agent would be considered weak and would be assigned to paperwork behind a desk, if not fired immediately.

However, that didn't change the fact that he was loyal to GUN, the organization that Shadow held a grudge against, and within reason. He would not allow himself to treat the man any differently from how he would the commander himself just because he acted differently.

He glared at him one last time, just for good measure, before rushing off, ignoring the numerous calls of approaching paparazzi hoping to snag an interview with him about his latest battle with the egg-obsessed madman. Sometimes, under pressure from Rouge, he would give in and answer a few questions, just for publicity's sake and gaining the people's support, which provided a sense of protection by fame in the masses. Like a politician without the politics, or like actors without all the nonsense drama.

However, he was already having a bad day since the beginning and he didn't want to add 'trampled by the media to the list of things that just made the day worse, especially since it was a rather sentimental day for him and his friends. Leaving the city in a flash, he made his way to Green Hill in a black blur, taking the quickest and least populated route to its outskirts, where the land met the sea in a high cliff.

When he was near enough, he slid to a halt behind some trees and began to walk through them, trudging down a path only his eyes could see, making his way to the one place that brought him a little peace and, occasionally, a small smile on his face on a really bad day.

In less than three minutes, he dropped down onto the ground, his legs crossed in a lotus position mirroring the statue opposite him. Sighing deeply, he looked up to meet stone eyes, mentally taking comfort in their warmth.

"_What's up, Shadz?_" He could imagine him saying.

Sometimes, he would speak to the statue, imagine how the blue hedgehog would respond to whatever he had to say, usually a snarky comeback or a thumbs up. But, right then, he did not feel like it, instead taking comfort in the peace and quiet and in the almost-real presence of a trusted friend.

Closing his eyes, he leaned back and relaxed, hoping to make up for the lost sleep his nightmare brought. It had become a habit of his to seek refuge from his nightmares and inner demons at his memorial, as it reminded him of the blue hedgehog and his crazy attitude but steadfast care for everyone, including him.

"_Take care of yourselves, everyone. Catch you on the flip side!_"

He could still hear him whisper that phrase, reminding him that he promised to live his life to the fullest, that he would not isolate himself in his misery. And Shadow always kept his word.

He did not know how long he stayed there, but when he opened his eyes, he was greeted by an orange sky, a sure sign of a nearing sunset. Realizing that he would have to leave, he stood up and looked over at the still smiling statue.

"Thank you, Sonic." He whispered, returning the smile, his voice sincere. "For everything you've ever done, for us and for me. And for what it's worth," he pulled out a single ring from his running supply, the same kind Sonic collected for his adventures. He placed it reverently on the statues base, which rippled with the energy for a moment before it faded into the air around it.

"…happy birthday."

With that, Shadow sped off, and in a blink of an eye, was at Tails' front porch, five minutes before their appointed time of meeting up. Knocking thrice, he entered without waiting, knowing that they young fox was expecting him anyway and would not take offense.

"Hey, Shadow." He bobbed his head out in the hallway, smiling and waving, leading him to the living room, where Rouge, Amy and even Knuckles were already seated at. They each greeted him, and he gave his own greetings of acknowledgement before leaning against the door, his arms crossed in his trademark pose.

"Now that we're all here," Tails said, taking a large sheet of paper and spreading it out on the table in the center of the room "let's discuss what we're going to do for this mission."

"What are we going to do, again?" Knuckles asked, tilting his head lazily. All of them had discussed this before, but for some reason, he had been living up to his name and had not been paying attention then.

"Can you get any denser?" Rouge looked him up and down sceptically. Knuckles only waved her off, seemingly not getting riled up like he used to.

"We're going to steal a Chaos Emerald, Knuckles." Tails explained. "We have information from Rouge that Eggman plans on stealing all seven again, maybe to power his new robot. We don't know how many he already has, but we should try to get as many away from him as we can."

Suddenly remembering his encounter with the doctor that morning, Shadow coughed into his fist, catching everyone's attention. Feeling smug, he pulled out the yellow Chaos Emerald and held it up for all of them to see.

"You have one!" Amy said, reaching forward, and Shadow handed it over to her. "Don't tell me you went and got the one we were supposed to steal tonight?"

"Our target is the green one." Tails said, but even he looked at Shadow in curiosity. "Where'd you get that one?"

"Eggman." He shrugged. Knuckles burst out laughing, giving him a look that said '_nice one_' which Shadow returned with a smirk.

"That puts us one step ahead of him!" Tails exclaimed gleefully. "That's great, Shadow. I'll put it in my workshop, where it can't be tracked."

Shadow, having enough of everyone's attention, shrugged neutrally. "Let's make that two. What's the plan?"

On his prompt, Tails started explaining further. "So far, the only other emerald I've located is in some business man's safe, in the outskirts of Stations Square. The street it's on isn't full of people and it's mostly abandoned, but the security's pretty tight."

"If it's safe, why do we have to steal it?" Amy asked.

"This man is even denser than this echidna here." Rouge said, earning a 'hey' from said guardian, who suddenly seemed like he remembered what was going on around him. "He doesn't know the difference between a real emerald and a chaos emerald."

"And that would be dangerous." Amy agreed, understanding. "So, how do we get in?"

Tails carefully explained how they planned to steal the emerald. He and Shadow would sneak into the building through the ceiling's windows, what with the fox's abilities to fly and skill with machines and contraptions. After making their way into the security control room, Tails would hack into the generator-powered computer program that guarded the safe so that it would open without an alarm. From there, he would alert Knuckles to cut the power of the building, forcing the guards to leave and investigate. Within that time, Shadow would have sneaked his way into the safe and switched the real emerald with a fake.

When each of their respective jobs were done, they would individually make their way to Amy and Rouge two blocks away through different routes, to avoid anyone following them.

"Wait," Amy asked, eyes narrowing. "Why do _we_ not have anything to do?"

"We've talked about this before, Amy." Tails said, turning to explain to her. "You and Rouge are far enough away not to be considered 'involved', but in case something in the plan goes wrong and one of us may be compromised, we need you two to act as a distraction to draw their attention away so we can get out."

"Why us two, then?" Rouge asked, raising an eyebrow.

Everyone stared at the bat, including Shadow, as if she refused to see the answer. Apparently, she didn't understand the problem when a rich man's safe and a jewel thief were placed in the same room.

Instead, Knuckles turned to answer Amy's question. "It was my idea, actually. I figured you didn't want to have your name spoiled on the official records in case it came to that. Tails is too young for it to remain permanent and Shadow and I don't care at all."

"Oh," Amy said, nodding her head. "That makes sense."

Tails pulled out five identical wrist watches and handing one to each of them, and putting one on his left wrist.

"There are our communicators for giving the signals." He said. "We can contact each other individually by punching in the right code. If you'll look at the strap closely, there's this really small button that's pretty well hidden."

Shadow studied the small watch, finding the almost indistinguishable feature Tails spoke of. It looked more like an indentation in the leather, but when he ran his finger over it, he could feel the button inside the leather. Putting the watch so that he could still see it from beneath the cuffs of his gloves, he noticed that the small knob fell where his arm's bone stuck out when he bent his wrist.

"What's it do?" Knuckles asked, studying the watch himself.

"It's an emergency button." Tails explained, his voice lowering a bit. "It's to alert the rest of us that we need help, pronto. Try it."

Shadow, having already put it on, simple knocked his outer wrist to the wall behind him, feeling the small object click. At the same moment, the rest of the wrist watches started blinking in a pattern of five.

"The number of blinks tells us who's in trouble." Tails explained. "It corresponds to which communicator we have. The number's written on the underside."

"Great job, Tails!" Knuckles exclaimed. "This is pretty sweet."

"Thanks, Knuckles." Tails replied, grinning. "Anyway, we should start preparing, scanning the area and such."

"Not so fast there, fox boy." Rouge said, causing everyone to turn back to her. "You still haven't told me why I'm just a back-up for this mission when I'm more than capable of doing the entire mission on my own."

Tails, Knuckles and even Amy exchanged nervous looks, as if not wanting to tell her off about her thieving habits. Instead, they all stared at Shadow, silently passing him the job.

"You may not be a GUN agent anymore," Shadow told her, deciding to use the other reason why she was put on the sidelines. Although he had no qualms about telling her off, she would simply argue with him and they'd never get going. "But you answer directly to the president outside the organization. It would cause even more trouble if you were found to be involved."

"Hm, I guess that makes sense." She smiled after a moment, satisfied with their reasoning. "Just make sure you grab me some extra jewels while you're in there, Shadow."

His left eye twitched in annoyance. "No."

* * *

Five minutes had passed since Knuckles had arrived at their rendezvous spot and ten since Shadow had successfully completed the mission. All that was left was for Tails, the mastermind behind their plan, to arrive so that their mission could be officially labelled a success.

Another two minutes of waiting later, he still had not arrived. They tried to contact him through his communicator, but the only response on the other side was static.

"Something's wrong." Amy waved her arms frantically as her voice rose in worry. "It's not like him to not answer."

Shadow cursed. The green Chaos Emerald was securely placed in a small bag strapped to his torso, and he had hoped to give it to the young fox for safekeeping and call it a night. But if Tails wasn't here yet, then what was supposed to be a simple get-in/get-out operation had somehow, at the last minute, gone wrong.

"I'll go after him." Knuckles growled, sprinting forward into the darkness in a run, not waiting for their permission or agreement. Unfortunately, he had left his communicator with them, not liking technology in the least, and they had no way of contacting him to tell him otherwise. If he somehow ran into trouble, then he wouldn't be able to call for help.

"Now someone has to go after _him_." Shadow said, crossing his arms and sighing in annoyance. However, feeling tension in the air, he looked up to see both Amy and Rouge staring at him expectantly, as if that 'someone' was _him_.

"You have the fastest chance of finding them." Rouge quickly supplied before Shadow could even open his mouth to protest. Having been the superior agent in GUN during their time, he recognized the commanding tone that gave no room for argument.

Without a word, he turned on his heel and skated forward, leaving the girls underneath the single, functioning streetlight. It did not take him long to reach Knuckles, who could not run as fast as him.

"You go ahead." Knuckles told him. "I have a bad feeling about this, and I'd feel better if you get to Tails ASAP." Seeing Shadow's questioning look, he added "I'll follow in a few."

Nodding, Shadow skated forward, a little concerned. In spite of his thick-headedness and gullibility, the echidna had a six sense for things and events, possibly because of his relation with the Master Emerald. When he said that something bad might happen, it was best to keep one's guard up and be prepared for the worst.

When he had rounded the corner to the street that had their target building, he was met with the sight of the young fox sitting against a street light, his eyes closed as if he was asleep. Calling his name had no effect, and it was safe to assume that he was unconscious.

More than just a little worried, Shadow skid to a halt before him and knelt down, quickly checking over his vitals. When he felt that his heartbeat was still strong and his breathing normal, he sighed with relief. However, still not satisfied, he continued his checking, looking over his arms, legs and torso to see for injuries.

The sound of footsteps behind him, alerting him to Knuckles' presence, came at the same time that he felt a small bump on the fox's head, and was probably the reason he was out cold. But by the location of the bruise on the fox's head, Shadow quickly figured that it was intentional, as if someone had knocked him out on purpose.

Behind him, the footsteps became louder but longer in between, until they came to a stop to where Shadow figured were only a few feet behind him.

"Shadow…" Knuckles' unusually nervous voice from behind made him look over his shoulder to see the echidna standing stiffly, his arms at his side and his eyes wide with disbelief and a mixture of emotions, which matched his shocked face.

"Took you long enough." Shadow replied harshly, not appreciating that he was just standing there like an idiot while they may have a threat to deal with. "Are you going to come over here and help me or do I have to threaten you to do so?"

"I'm afraid he can't do that."

Shadow's eyes widened at the familiar yet long unheard voice that rang through his ears, tone flat but unwavering. Slowly, as if in a trance, he turned his body around, first seeing Knuckles stare at him with wide eyes then at the figure behind him.

In the darkness behind Knuckles stood a hedgehog roughly the same height and build as Shadow, if not a little shorter and smaller. But while his black fur blended in with the night and his stripped quills were distinctively pointing upward, the other hedgehog's fur glowed blue in the darkness and his quills hung limp behind him.

But the eyes that Shadow once remembered to hold confidence, laughter and compassion were narrowed and glaring at him, and the once shimmering emerald green were hard and dull above a thin line that was his mouth.

"Sonic…" Shadow muttered, taking a step back, his hands releasing their grip on nothing and falling limp beside him. In any other situation, he would have cursed his voice for cracking, but this was different and he had unconsciously let his guard down.

Opposite him, the blue hedgehog lowered his brows and narrowed his eyes in response. "I don't know what you and this echidna are talking about, but that doesn't matter right now."

The arm that was hidden from his view behind Knuckles was lifted and brought around to the same level as his head, revealing what was pointed at his back moments ago.

Very quietly, but still enough for all three of them to hear, the gun clicked, ready to fire, as a gloved finger rested itself on the trigger.

"Now give me the chaos emerald I know you have, unless you want me to blow the echidna's brains out."

* * *

**_Argh. So yeah, that's how it all boils down to, for now. _**

**_Look, this is my first real multi-chapter story, so I have a lot of apprehension and insecurity regarding this. Hence, I would really love some feedback in any sort of form regarding this and the prologue. However, I'm not forcing anyone, so do as you please. Review if you wanna, I always say._**

**_Thanks for taking the time to read this. If anyone's interested, the next chapters will come, I promise, but how soon, that I cannot tell. So bear with me. _**


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